Stress Mimics

As some of you know i lost my password to this blog and was unable to reset it for over a year. In that time a lot has happened.

I was taking Prozac for my anxiety. The medication was working great for the first little while. I was not nervous to drive and got my G1. I was able to keep my health anxiety at a minimum. If i had any health symptoms, i was able to focus and not have it play on my mind. All was going wonderful, until I started to have short term memory loss. It was really scary for me. It might or might not have been the Prozac doing this i really don't know. It might have been that i just had to much on my mind.

The last straw for me was when i took both my son and my daughter to her Brownies Club. I came home and my husband asked me where our 4 year old son was. I drew a blank. Then my older daughter said "You left him there?". I was so embarrassed and worried. I ran back as fast as i could to the Brownies Club to find my son with a leader and crying because he couldn't find me.

This was the end of prozac for me. This incident plus others that i won't mention as the list goes on. I took myself off Prozac and decided to deal with my health anxiety without medication.

Since i haven't been on any medication. I still find i have some memory loss. I truly believe that this time it is because i have way to much on my mind. Also the things i forget are shows i have watched before or what i ate for breakfast. NOT forgetting my children somewhere.

I have believed that i have had, kidney stones, cancer in numerous places. (cancer in my neck lymph notes as of today) breast cancer that is starting from my underarm, brain tumor and recently heart attack.

The heart attack symptoms i was unable to let go. I had to make a hospital visit. I tried really hard to realize it was anxiety kicking in but then i had a huge pain in the middle of my chest and that did it for me. Off to the ER i went. To later get the diagnoses that i have chest wall arthritis. They took blood work that is standard for heart attack patients and hooked me up to a machine for quite awhile. So with all of this done. I was able to move on with my life.

As of today i have a lump in my neck and think it is cancer. I also know that you can get enlarged lymph note on one side of your neck. But this one feels like there is a lump attached to my lymph note. I have been to a few dentist appointments as well because i know that good health starts with your teeth. But this lump on my lymph note is still there even after getting my teeth looked at and cleaned. So it isn't from my teeth. Good news is it doesn't seem to be growing. And the weird thing is some days it hurts and other days i forget about it as if it isn't there. But as soon as i remember it. I feel around and it seems normal. Until i keep playing around for it. Weird.

I hate being a hypochondriac.

I decided to get a hold of my anxiety and let all this go as much as i can until the new year. I am going to be booking a physical soon and have my list ready for my doctor.

I have had almost nil symptoms until last night.

Yesterday I went for an hours drive to pay to have my licence re instated. Then I was told I just had to re write the test. So I head over to do that and they told me that my ID wasn't in the best shape that I had to have a garnetor sign this form and that I had to wait 3 hours for the boss to be in to okay everything. So here I drove 1/2 hour to have my doctor sign the paper. I drive a half hour back. I wait till the boss is in and the B^tch said that my Id was no good and the form won't be enough. ARRRR I was so angry. So i decided to drive an hour and a half to a hick town and see if they would pass my ID. NOPE instead they said that they can't accept the form because I only had the month and year and I forgot the day. Right away the B^tch. Took her pen and wrote VOID on it.

So then I come home get on the net to order a new birth certificate. However, My mother has passed away and i don't know half the information that this form needed. So I am crossing my fingers that I can get my birth certificate without more head aches.
I also have one of those old red health cards and need a new one from wear. And it turns out I need three pieces of ID. So That won't be happening. I need this new birth certificate to go through.

Anyways, I had a little numbness/tingling/blurred vision. It subsided in a few hours after all this. But then last night just before bed, My left side stared to act up again. I even woke up with numb hands. And hives.

So of course I am thinking I have MS and that it is acting up again. I hate this.

The good news is that I had the theripist call me yesterday, However I missed the call due to all the running around yesterday. I left a message again and hope to her back from her today.